“The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night…


Down there… are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a sort of mass-produced darkness of the soul. Sin, you might say, without a trace of originality. They accept evil not because they say yes, but because they don’t say no.

— Lord Vetinari, Guards! Guards! by Sir Terry Pratchett

This article is split into two halves. The first contains no spoilers. The second, after a big red warning, contains many.

“Guards” by Kairosis on DeviantArt depicting Nobby, Carrot, Vimes, and Colon from Discworld.
“Guards” by Kairosis on DeviantArt depicting Nobby, Carrot, Vimes, and Colon from Discworld.

I’ve read nearly every…

Paul Nabil Matthis

By day, I’m a musician and author with a completed manuscript for a Syrian cyberpunk novel. By night, that’s none of your business. Thanks for reading.

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